Legal Terms for the Alzheimer’s Caregiver
When a loved one is diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease, legal issues are probably the last thing on anyone’s mind. But because dementia will eventually render them unable to make financial and medical decisions, the Alzheimer’s Association urges families to begin legal planning right away.
Here are the key terms you will encounter as you prepare for the future:
Dementia patients should appoint a Durable Power of Attorney (DPOA), a responsible person to act as their Agent in financial and legal matters. This legal document gives the agent the immediate authority to manage banking and investments, sell property, and more.
Advance Directives allow the Alzheimer’s patient to take an active role in their end-of-life planning. These are written documents that express their wishes related to their health care.
An important advance directive is the Durable Power of Attorney for Health Care (DPOA-HC), which names the person chosen to make decisions for your loved one when they no longer can. In Michigan, this person is known as the Patient Advocate. Michigan law also allows patient advocates to make decisions about mental health care and to donate organs upon death.
Another advance directive is a Living Will, a document that communicates a patient’s intentions about whether they should be kept on life-support. This also grants the patient advocate authority to make this decision. Michigan is one of three states that do not consider a living will legally binding, but can be useful to the patient advocate when making end-of-life decisions.
A DNR, short for “do not resuscitate,” is a medical form informing medical personnel not to perform CPR if the patient’s heart stops. A copy should be given to physicians and caregivers. Michigan law states that DNR orders are only valid when the patient is at home or in an assisted-living facility. Hospitals and nursing homes may or may not honor the document, depending on their policies.
Sometimes these directives are not enough to ensure the Alzheimer’s patient is healthy and safe, and the caregiver must seek Guardianship from a judge. This requires filing a petition in probate court to take power over a patient’s financial, medical and other life decisions as guardian or Conservator.
For more information about planning ahead, visit the Alzheimer’s and Dementia Caregiver Center
Tips for Spouses Caring for a Loved One with Dementia
When a spouse or partner is diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease or another type of dementia, the entire family feels the impact. It is a tough condition for the senior to live with and for a family caregiver to manage. The journey can be both emotionally and physically demanding.
Understanding how to navigate the challenges that come with the disease is essential for both the caregiver and the person with Alzheimer’s. Here are some suggestions to help you feel more confident on this difficult path.
Caregiving for a Loved One with Dementia
- Educate yourself: Understanding the form of dementia your family member has is the first step in managing it effectively. Take time to learn about the disease, its stages, and the common behaviors associated with it. Resources such as the Alzheimer’s Association and the National Institute on Aging can provide you with valuable information and insight. Being informed will help you feel empowered as you care for a loved one with dementia.
- Establish a routine: Individuals with memory loss often feel more secure when there is a structured routine. Establish daily schedules for meals, activities, and rest. Consistency helps reduce anxiety and confusion, making it easier for your spouse to navigate their day.
- Communicate clearly: As the disease follows its typical course, communication may become more challenging. Using simple language, speaking slowly, and maintaining eye contact can help. Avoid overwhelming your partner with too many open-ended questions or choices at once. Non-verbal communication, such as gestures and facial expressions, can also be very effective.
- Focus on the present: Alzheimer’s can lead to memory loss and confusion about the past. For a spouse or adult child, it can also be tough not to think back to what the senior was able to do before developing dementia. Instead, try to focus on the present. Engage in activities that promote meaningful experiences, such as listening to music, going for walks, tending a garden, or doing light housekeeping chores.
- Encourage independence: While it’s important to assist your spouse, especially if their safety is at risk, it’s also essential to encourage them to do as much as they can on their own. Small tasks, such as making their bed or setting the table at mealtime, can help maintain a sense of independence and dignity. Offer help only when necessary and celebrate their accomplishments, no matter how small they might seem.
- Create a safe environment: Safety is a major concern as dementia progresses. Take a proactive approach to making home modifications that can help prevent accidents. Check stair treads for stability, install grab bars in the bathroom, and ensure that frequently used items are easily accessible. Also, consider using safety devices like home security systems or GPS tracking devices if your senior loved one is at risk for wandering. Remember, research shows that six in ten adults diagnosed with Alzheimer’s will wander.
- Manage stress: Caring for a spouse with Alzheimer’s can be overwhelming. It’s essential to take care of your own well-being. Establish a support system of friends and family or join a support group. Regularly connect and engage in activities that bring you joy, whether it’s exercise, hobbies, or simply spending time with loved ones.
- Plan for the future: While it may be difficult, planning for the future is vital. Discuss legal and financial matters early on, including power of attorney and advanced healthcare directives. Make arrangements for long-term care if needed. Planning can provide peace of mind and ensure that both you and your spouse are taken care of in the years ahead.
- Embrace moments of joy: Amid the challenges of the day, try to find ways to celebrate small victories and cherish joyful moments. Joy might not be as obvious as it once was, but you’ll likely find it if you look. Maintaining a positive outlook can make a significant difference for both of you.
Visit a Heritage Community Near You
Caring for a family member with Alzheimer’s is a journey filled with challenges, but it can also be rich with love and connection. When the days feel overwhelming and you need a break, don’t hesitate to seek professional assistance.
Respite care in a senior living community that offers specialized dementia care can provide much-needed support. These services can help you take a break, recharge, and maintain your own health while ensuring your spouse receives quality care. Call the Heritage community nearest you to learn more today!
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Advice to Help New Caregivers Get Organized
Dear Donna:
I recently returned home to Michigan from New York to help care for my parents. While I live close to them, we’re not in the same house. They both have different health concerns and need someone to oversee their care and household tasks.
My employer allows me to work remotely, but I still put in a lot of hours each week. I’m really struggling to get organized. Do you have any suggestions to help a new caregiver like me? I’m really overwhelmed.
Sincerely,
Chris in Grand Haven, MI
Organizational Tips for New Family Caregivers
Dear Chris:
Assuming the role of family caregiver is a big undertaking. When you factor in your relocation and busy job, it’s easy to see why you are struggling. Here are some suggestions I hope will be beneficial:
- Accept that you will need help.
Adult children often believe they should be able to manage their aging parents’ support on their own. Very rarely is this realistic. As you take on this new role, recognize that you will need to ask for and accept help. That support might come in many forms.
It could be asking a friend or family member to stay with your parents for an hour or two while you relax and see a movie or have your hair done. You could also ask a friend to pick up a few groceries or drop off dinner to your parents.
- Organize caregiving details.
Many adult children say they feel an extraordinary amount of stress when they first step into the caregiving role. They may worry they won’t do a good job or fear they will overlook important appointments or tasks. Getting organized can help relieve some of that anxiety.
Begin by blocking out time to set up a system. Sort and organize your parents’ important health care paperwork and legal documents. If you need to, ask a friend or family member to sit with your parents so you can have this uninterrupted time.
Organize their paperwork in a binder by topic or date (e.g., test results, medication list, and physician contact information). Also check to see if their health care provider has an online portal your parents can access. Taking time to review visit summaries, test results, and other notes can give you a better picture of what’s been happening.
Next, add your parents’ appointments and follow-up tasks to your personal calendar. If there are household tasks that need to be completed, place those on your calendar, too. This helps to avoid double-booking yourself or missing something. Not having to rely on your memory can alleviate some of your stress. Apps like My Medical can make tracking and organizing easier.
- Establish and stick to a routine.
This step may take some time, but having a routine can make caregiving more manageable. Try to cluster errands and appointments on one or two days each week. This will allow you to have uninterrupted blocks of time to work and handle your own needs.
It also requires fewer arrangements for a friend or family member to stay with your loved one. For example, if both parents have dentist appointments, schedule them concurrently. That allows you to make one trip instead of two.
- Connect with a caregiver support group.
Caregivers face unique challenges that others may not understand. It can be very isolating. Having a group of peers who understand and can empathize is usually beneficial to a caregiver’s emotional and physical well-being. Support group members may have specific ideas for juggling work with a caregiving schedule.
Peers can also commiserate with you about the emotional side of caregiving. For example, if you are feeling guilty, resentful, angry, or sad, you’ll likely find people who’ve experienced those emotions too. You can even connect with a support caregiver group online, if that is easier on your schedule.
- Practice good self-care.
Finally, follow the oxygen mask advice flight attendants share during their pre-flight safety talk: help yourself before helping others. Caregivers must make good self-care a priority. If you don’t, you’re more likely to experience a medical crisis of your own.
Respite services at assisted living communities may make that possible for you. Your parents can spend a week or so at a community while you take a vacation or just some time off.
I hope this information is helpful to you, Chris!
Kind regards,
Donna