by Shelley | Apr 5, 2021 | Dear Donna
Dear Donna:
My mom has always been very social. After my father passed away three years ago, she struggled without him. Just when she was getting back on her feet, the COVID-19 pandemic occurred. Since then, she has been forced to remain mostly isolated.
While she recently received her first COVID-19 vaccine, we know it will take a few months until she can be out and about again. Our family members routinely check in with her using Zoom and Skype, but it’s just not enough. I’m trying to find something she can do from home that will help her feel connected and purposeful.
Do you have any suggestions? I’m sure you’ve probably heard this question before and have some ideas.
Kind regards,
Krista in Saginaw, MI
Encouraging Virtual Volunteerism during National Volunteer Week
Dear Krista:
Your question is a timely one! National Volunteer Week begins on April 18. Research shows seniors who lend their time and talent to a cause close to their heart reap a variety of mental and physical health benefits. From fewer incidences of depression to less risk of heart disease, volunteering might be the perfect solution for your mother.
There are plenty of organizations looking for virtual volunteers. Since your mother seems comfortable using technology, there will be even more opportunities open to her. Here are a few suggestions for connecting.
First, contact the United Way agency nearest to your mother’s home. They might know of local nonprofits looking for remote volunteers. When the coronavirus is behind us, she might be able to lend her time to the organization in person.
If you don’t have any luck with that option, there are a variety of national organizations you can explore. Two with easy-to-navigate volunteer websites are:
- VolunteerMatch: This nonprofit organization has been matching volunteers with agencies in need since 1998. Because of the COVID-19 pandemic, their number of virtual volunteer opportunities increased to over 600,000 nationwide! Your mom could choose to be an eBook Buddy to a child who needs help reading. She might also be interested in writing social media posts for a nonprofit animal rescue or anti-bullying organization. There are volunteer projects for every interest imaginable.
- Points of Light Foundation: A global leader in nonprofit development, Points of Light Foundation also works to inspire and expand volunteer communities. They, too, have expanded the number of virtual projects volunteers can connect with. You can search their database for both short-term and long-term tasks your mother might be interested in.
I hope this gives you and your mother some useful ideas, Krista!
Sincerely,
Donna
Heritage Senior Communities in Michigan and Indiana
A family-owned senior living provider for four generations, Heritage Senior Communities has locations throughout Michigan and one in Indiana. If you have questions about independent living, assisted living, or memory care, call the Heritage community nearest you to talk with one of our team members. We are always happy to help!
by Shelley | Mar 27, 2026 | Dear Donna
Dear Donna:
Since my husband passed away unexpectedly three years ago, I am on my own. We didn’t have any children, so I am trying to create a plan for my future care needs. While I do have extended family and lots of friends, I know I need to be proactive in looking ahead.
That said, I don’t really know where to start. Do you have any suggestions for me?
Sincerely,
Pat in Traverse City, MI
Tips for Single Seniors Planning for Future Care Needs
Dear Pat:
What a good idea! Planning for the future is a step most of us need to take—whether we are single or married—but many people fail to do so. Then a crisis occurs and families are left struggling to figure out what to do.
Creating a care plan for the future as a single, older adult can provide peace of mind, kick-start conversations with loved ones, and help secure essential services as needs change. A thoughtful plan covers health, housing, finances, legal matters, daily living, safety, and community resources.
Here’s a checklist of items to consider:
- Goals and priorities
- Reflect on what matters most: Independence, staying in your home, proximity to family or friends, transportation needs, and social connections are all factors to think about.
- Walk through potential future scenarios: While this might feel overwhelming, it’s necessary. Evaluate where you may need future help, such as bathing, medication management, or meal preparation, and what options are available to you.
- Health and daily care needs
- Create a current health snapshot: Develop a written list of any diagnoses, medications, allergies, primary care or specialist physicians, and any current therapies you have.
- Designate a medical decision-maker (health care proxy): This step ensures your preferences are documented (e.g., resuscitation wishes). You can use Michigan’s Advanced Directive forms to accomplish this. Depending upon your level of expertise, you might need to utilize the services of an attorney for this step.
- Plan a simple daily routine: Walk through what you do each day, including small details like filling up your med tray. Then consider who may be willing help with medications, care delivery, and appointments when your needs become more complex.
- Housing and living arrangements
- Assess options: Aging in place with family support, making home modifications, or moving to a senior living community that offers a variety of levels of care are all options to consider.
- Brainstorm home modifications: Aging at home, even in the short-term, may require renovations to improve safety and accessibility (non-slip flooring, improved lighting, bathroom rails). Gather estimates now to better understand potential costs.
- Finances and benefits
- Take a financial inventory: This should include income, assets, debts, and ongoing expenses. It’s an important piece of planning for the future.
- Analyze potential expenses: Make a plan for potential long-term care costs for both moving to a senior living community and staying at home. This apple-to-apple comparison helps you understand that true costs of care.
- Review and organize key documents: Bank statements, insurance policies, and bills you regularly pay are important for loved ones to know about should you be suddenly unable to handle things on your own.
- Check eligibility for programs: Look at both federal and Michigan-specific programs, such as veterans benefits for surviving spouses, MI Choice, and property tax relief programs or senior exemptions, for possible financial assistance.
- Consider fiduciary options: If managing finances becomes challenging, you’ll want to ensure you have a plan to appoint a trusted person or professional to handle finances.
- Legal planning
- Create or update essential documents: This includes advanced directives, power of attorney for financial matters, and will or trust paperwork. You should also have a routine for updating these regularly.
- Think through guardianship contingency planning: If you ever need someone to assist with decisions, this will be important.
- Designate a place to store copies: It should be secure and easy to find. Then share access with your designated agents. Consider both digital and hard copies.
- Transportation and social connectedness
- Plan how you’ll run errands and participate in social activities: Family, friends, rideshare options, senior transportation services, or volunteer drivers can help you get to where you need to be.
- Think about how to maintain social ties to prevent isolation: Regular visits with friends and loved ones, phone checks, and participation in community centers or faith-based groups keep you socially connected and active.
Finally, I would suggest you create a document that incorporates all of the above in an easy-to-navigate format. Make sure it’s done in a way that you can review and update quarterly or after major health changes. Share it with trusted loved ones. Depending upon your comfort level with technology, you could consider saving it to a cloud service, such as Google Drive or Sync.
I hope this checklist is useful to you! As you create your plan, please contact one of our senior living communities in Traverse City for a tour. One of our team members will be happy to answer any questions and offer insight into planning for the future.
Kind regards,
Donna
by Shelley | Dec 29, 2025 | Caregiving
Winter can be a challenging season for caregivers, especially those who live in northern states like Michigan and Indiana. Shorter daylight hours, colder weather, and the post-holiday slump can intensify feelings of exhaustion, isolation, or emotional strain. When your focus is on supporting others, it’s easy to overlook your own needs.
However, practicing healthy self-care isn’t a luxury, it’s essential. It’s as vital to the person you provide care for as it is to you. Here are five practical strategies to help you beat the caregiver blues this winter and restore your sense of balance and well-being.
5 Tips for Caregivers to Protect Mental Health during the Winter
- Practice small, consistent self-care rituals.
Grand self-care plans often fall apart during busy days of caregiving. Instead, focus on small rituals that create steady emotional nourishment. Start with five-minute practices you can realistically maintain: stretch when you wake up, stand by a sunny window to catch morning light, or enjoy a warm drink before tackling the day’s responsibilities. These tiny pauses calm your nervous system and help counter the sluggishness that winter often brings.
If possible, schedule one weekly activity just for yourself. It could be taking a short walk at the park, engaging in a hobby you’ve neglected, or enjoying a relaxing bath. Think of these as non-negotiable appointments. The consistency of small acts like these helps replenish the energy reserves you rely on for caregiving.
- Increase light and movement to boost your mood.
Winter’s lack of sunlight can disrupt sleep patterns and decrease serotonin levels, contributing to mood dips. Combat this by maximizing natural daylight and incorporating movement into your routine.
Open blinds early, take quick outdoor breaks even if it’s chilly, or consider using a light-therapy lamp in the morning. Pairing light exposure with gentle movement, such as a 10-minute session on a walking pad, stretching exercises, or chair yoga, can improve focus, boost mood, and reduce tension.
The key is not intensity but frequency: small bursts of light and movement throughout the day can be remarkably uplifting.
- Don’t hibernate.
Caregiving duties combined with cold weather can make it tempting to hibernate. But reduced social interaction and isolation can amplify stress and sadness, so staying connected is essential. You might have to be a little more creative to stay connected if your family member can’t be left alone.
Schedule regular check-ins with friends or family, whether through phone calls, text threads, or virtual coffee chats. Join an online caregiver community or support group where others understand your challenges without explanation. These connections provide a sense of belonging, reduce emotional load, and remind you that you’re not alone in your experience.
If you prefer in-person interactions, try inviting a friend over for tea or asking someone to join you on a short walk. Nurturing these social ties helps counteract winter’s isolating effect.
- Ask for—and accept—help without guilt.
Caregivers often shoulder more than they should, which increases the risk of burnout. Winter’s demands can make things feel even heavier. This season, challenge yourself to ask for help early and often.
Consider delegating small tasks to family members, neighbors, or friends, such as picking up groceries, helping with transportation, or covering an hour of care so you can rest. Explore community resources like respite services, volunteer visitor programs, or adult day programs if available.
Most importantly, release the idea that accepting help means you’re not doing enough. Seeking support is a sign of awareness and strength, not weakness.
- Create moments of joy and meaning.
Winter doesn’t need to just be a season you endure. Instead, find ways to infuse it with simple joys that brighten the season. Start by identifying activities that genuinely make you feel good: listening to favorite music, watching a comforting movie, baking something fragrant, or doing crafts with the person you’re caring for.
Small, intentional moments of joy help counterbalance stress and create emotional resilience. Consider introducing seasonal traditions, such as lighting a candle at dusk, writing in a gratitude journal, or planning a weekly “cozy night” with blankets and warm foods. These rituals give you something to look forward to and offer a sense of grounding.
Consider Respite When You Need a Winter Break
If you are feeling overwhelmed with and exhausted by the demands of caregiving, a weekend away or a staycation at home might be the solution. Utilizing the respite services of a senior living community can make that possible. Your family member will receive the same care and support as long-term residents, and you’ll have peace of mind knowing they are in good hands.
We encourage you to call a Heritage location near you to learn more about our respite care programs and schedule a visit to one of our communities!
by Shelley | Jul 28, 2025 | Caregiving, Dear Donna
Dear Donna:
We are just beginning the search for an assisted living community in Michigan for my dad. We hope to have him moved in and settled before the snow begins to fly. While I believe the social aspects of community life will be very good for my dad, I’m struggling with the idea of giving up being his primary caregiver. It sounds silly as the role has been very demanding, but I’m concerned we’ll lose the close connection we’ve built.
Do you have any suggestions for how I can stay involved once we find a new place for my dad? And are family members really welcomed at communities? I would appreciate any suggestions and advice.
Steve in Grand Haven, MI
Staying Connected After a Loved One Moves to Assisted Living
Dear Steve:
It’s not silly at all! In fact, the feelings you are expressing are shared by many adult children. When a parent moves into an assisted living community, it can be a big transition for the whole family. While it’s natural to feel a mix of relief and concern, staying connected to them and their daily life can make the experience more positive for everyone.
Getting to know the staff and getting involved not only supports your parent emotionally but also helps build relationships that foster a stronger sense of community.
- Attend events: Start by attending social events, family nights, or seasonal celebrations. These gatherings provide a great way to meet and engage with your parent’s new neighbors and show support. Most communities welcome family participation and typically post calendars of upcoming activities online. Simply being present for a game night, woodworking class, or a concert sends the message to your dad and the team that you are interested and supportive.
- Share your time: Volunteering is another meaningful way to engage. You could help organize events or offer to share special skills you might have, such as teaching a computer class or helping with raised bed gardening. And you’ll likely find you benefit from volunteering your time as much as the residents do!
- Communicate with staff: Regular communication with the community team is also essential. Building rapport with caregivers, nurses, and activity directors ensures your dad’s needs are being met and helps address any concerns early. It’s also a good way to advocate for your parent if changes are needed.
One final suggestion is to continue to include your dad in outings or family traditions whenever possible. An outdoor lunch, a holiday gathering, or even a simple walk can maintain his connection to home life.
Being part of your parent’s assisted living experience doesn’t mean being there every day—it means staying present, involved, and proactive. Your ongoing involvement sends a powerful message: they are loved, valued, and supported in this new chapter of life.
Visit a Heritage Location Near You
Since you mentioned you are beginning to search for an assisted living community in Michigan, I would like to extend an invitation to you and your dad to visit a Heritage location near you. Our team will be happy to take you on a tour and answer all of your questions. We can even arrange for the two of you to participate in a community activity of your choosing. Call us today to set up a time!
Kind regards,
Donna
by Shelley | Apr 28, 2025 | Healthy Aging
As we age, the demands of life often shift. We may find ourselves with more time to reflect on our past, present, and future. As people look to the future, many question their purpose going forward. But the search for meaning is important at every age, not just as we grow older.
Living with purpose can bring fulfillment, joy, and peace. Whether you’re entering retirement, transitioning into a new chapter of life, or simply reflecting on your legacy, a sense of purposefulness can be transformative.
The Importance of Purpose in Older Age
Creating a lifestyle of meaningful days can have tangible benefits for mental, emotional, and physical well-being. Research shows that people with a strong sense of purpose tend to experience lower rates of depression, anxiety, and stress. Moreover, they often enjoy better overall health, including a reduced risk of chronic diseases and even longer life expectancy.
Living with purpose can also enhance cognitive function, helping to keep the mind sharp and engaged as one ages. Researchers think it’s because curiosity leads people to keep learning and challenging the brain. In essence, purpose gives the brain an aerobic workout.
Redefining Purpose in Later Life
As we age, our sense of purpose may evolve. What mattered to us in our younger years—career goals, personal achievements—may no longer hold the same weight. Instead, we might shift our focus to more introspective pursuits, such as fostering personal growth, nurturing relationships, or giving back to our communities. Redefining purpose in later life doesn’t mean abandoning previous goals but rather finding new ways to express meaning.
For many older adults, this process may involve exploring passions and hobbies that were put on hold due to the demands of work or family life. It might also mean pursuing new interests or rekindling old ones—whether it’s painting, writing, gardening, or learning a new skill. Engaging in creative or meaningful activities can provide a sense of accomplishment and fulfillment that invigorates the soul.
Giving Back: The Power of Legacy
Another key element of living with purpose as you grow older is considering the impact you want to have on future generations. As we accumulate life experience, there is often a deep desire to leave a positive legacy. This might be through mentoring younger people, volunteering for causes that resonate, or simply sharing wisdom gained over the years. Many older individuals find great purpose in volunteering in their communities or supporting causes they are passionate about.
The idea of creating a legacy can also extend to the relationships we nurture. Being present and offering guidance or emotional support to loved ones can provide a sense of connection and fulfillment. These relationships create a web of meaning that sustains us as we grow older.
Embracing the Journey
Living with purpose as we grow older involves embracing change and finding meaning in each stage of life. It requires each of us to be open to new experiences and have the courage to follow paths that may not have been part of our original plans. That means saying yes to new opportunities when we might be tempted to say no.
By focusing on what truly matters—whether it’s relationships, creativity, contribution, or personal growth—we can approach aging with a renewed sense of vitality. We can transform retirement years into a time of self-discovery, fulfillment, and deep connection.
Visit a Heritage Community Near You
Experiencing meaningful days is easier when you are part of a community. Heritage residents have ample opportunities to build a lifestyle that allows them to stay active and engaged each day. We invite you to schedule a visit to a Heritage location near you to learn more!
