Busting Common Myths About Assisted Living

Dear Donna:

My 84-year-old mother has been living on her own for about 7 years now. The first few years after my father passed away, she managed very well. Recently, however, things have changed.

My husband and I both work full time and have kids in high school and college. While we visit often to help her, it really isn’t enough. She recently had a bad car accident and totaled her vehicle. My mom was at fault and decided it was time to give up driving.

We take off work to transport her to appointments, grocery stores, and more. Between my husband, kids, and I, we also do most of her household chores. It is a struggle.

A few weeks ago, I sat down with my mom to talk about moving to an assisted living community. We discussed how isolated she feels and that she knows how much stress it is on me to be a sandwich generation caregiver. Though she is receptive to the idea, I think she is also hanging on to outdated myths about senior living. She can’t exactly articulate those to me.

Can you help me to better understand the most common myths about assisted living? How can I correct my mom’s perceptions?

Sincerely,

Stacey in Hudsonville, MI

Identifying and Overcoming Common Myths About Assisted Living

Dear Stacey:

That is very perceptive! For older adults who aren’t familiar with assisted living communities, believing inaccurate information isn’t all that uncommon. These incorrect beliefs can even make a person hesitant to explore assisted living.

While it’s natural to feel unsure about such a big transition, much of the fear around assisted living comes from common myths that don’t reflect reality. Let’s bust some of the most persistent misconceptions and take a closer look at what assisted living really offers.

Myth #1: “Assisted living is the same as a nursing home.”

Reality: This is one of the most common and misleading myths. While both offer care, assisted living and nursing homes are very different.

• Assisted living communities are designed for seniors who need some help with daily activities—like dressing, bathing, or managing medications—but are still relatively independent. Residents have a private apartment or suite with plenty of freedom, privacy, and access to social activities.
• Nursing homes, on the other hand, are for individuals with more complex medical needs who require round-the-clock clinical care. Residents receive the same help with activities of daily living in addition to assistance with needs such as wound care, IV therapy, respiratory care, and more.

Myth #2: “I’ll lose my independence.”

Reality: Assisted living is meant to support independence, not take it away. Residents can decorate their own spaces, choose their daily routines, participate in activities (or not), and maintain their own lifestyles. They receive help only where and when it’s needed.

Many seniors find they actually gain independence because they’re no longer burdened by home maintenance, cooking, or managing health needs alone. They also appreciate having transportation services so they don’t have to ask adult children to drive them to appointments.

Myth #3: “The environment is hospital-like and depressing.”

Reality: Modern assisted living communities are far from institutional. They are often beautifully designed with comfortable common areas, landscaped gardens, spacious private apartments, and resort-style amenities like salons, fitness centers, and even art studios.

The goal is to make residents feel at home. There’s a strong focus on community, wellness, and fun. You’ll typically see residents engaged in both formal (e.g., craft projects or fitness classes) and informal gatherings.

Myth #4: “I won’t know anyone or make new friends.”

Reality: Assisted living communities are intentionally designed to foster friendships and engagement. With activities like group fitness classes, movie nights, outings, and shared meals, residents have countless opportunities to connect with others.

Many seniors report feeling less lonely and more socially active after moving into assisted living. That’s important because the health risks associated with isolation among older adults can be quite serious.

Myth #5: “It’s too expensive.”

Reality: While cost is a valid concern, it’s important to compare assisted living costs to current and future living expenses, including housing, utilities, groceries, transportation, and in-home care services. Assisted living often consolidates these costs into one monthly fee. In some cases, it may be more affordable than maintaining a private home, especially with the added value of safety and care.

Visit a Heritage Community in Person

Stacey, I hope that this information helps you determine what might be making your mom hesitant about assisted living communities. One final suggestion is to schedule a time to visit a Heritage community near you, including staying for lunch or dinner.

Kind regards,

Donna