by Shelley | Jun 27, 2025 | Caregiving
Dear Donna:
My great uncle lives with a couple of very serious medical conditions that require many health care appointments. Because he lives close to me and he doesn’t have any children, I have become his primary caregiver. While we have people who help with housekeeping and meals, my husband and I manage pretty much everything else for him.
The two of us and our teenagers are very fond of my uncle and want to do whatever we can to support him. However, I worry that I am not doing a great job monitoring his care. His needs are getting more and more complex.
Do you have any tips on advocating for a family elder? We could use whatever suggestions you might have with regard to health care, finances, and more.
Sincerely,
Katie in Spring Hill, MI
Tips to Help Family Caregivers Advocate for an Elder
Dear Katie:
What a great question! As our loved ones age, they often face increasing medical, financial, and legal challenges. We also know family members often worry about how well they are doing caring for a loved one. So, we are happy to have the opportunity to share some ideas.
Whether it’s navigating healthcare systems, dealing with insurance companies, or researching senior living communities, here are practical tips for being an effective advocate.
The first step in advocating for an older family member is understanding their needs, preferences, and concerns. Make time for open conversations with your uncle to make sure he feels valued and respected. Even if his memory is fading or he struggles with communication, it’s important to involve him in decisions as much as possible. Advocacy isn’t about taking control—it’s about empowering a senior loved one and helping them be heard.
Keep all important documents, such as medical records, insurance information, legal documents (wills, power of attorney), and contact information for doctors or caregivers, in one place. Having organized records can help you respond quickly in emergencies and ensure you have accurate information when speaking with professionals.
You can also create a folder—physical or digital—with a log of appointments, medications, and care instructions. This helps you stay on top of your uncle’s needs and ensures consistency if others are helping provide care.
- Learn about their rights.
Seniors have specific rights, especially in medical and long-term care settings. Learn about patients’ rights, elder abuse laws, and Medicare or Medicaid regulations. This knowledge will help you identify when something isn’t right—like being overcharged for care or pressured into unwanted treatments—and speak up effectively. Resources like the National Institute on Aging and your local Area Agency on Aging can provide helpful guidance.
- Communicate clearly and respectfully.
When interacting with healthcare providers, social workers, or service agencies, you may need to be assertive but respectful. Prepare questions ahead of appointments, take notes, and don’t hesitate to ask for clarification. If something doesn’t feel right, seek a second opinion.
Always aim to keep your loved one informed about conversations and decisions. Even if they’re unable to fully participate, being transparent helps maintain trust and dignity.
- Watch for changes and warning signs.
Advocacy also means being observant. Watch for signs of elder abuse, neglect, financial exploitation, or declining health. Unexplained injuries, sudden changes in mood, unusual financial transactions, or poor hygiene can all be red flags. If you suspect something is wrong, speak up and report it to the appropriate authorities or professionals.
I hope these tips are useful to you and your husband, Katie! If you have any more questions, we encourage you to contact a Heritage location near you. One of our experienced team members will be happy to help!
Kind regards,
Donna
by Shelley | Jun 27, 2025 | Alzheimer's and Dementia
Receiving an Alzheimer’s diagnosis for a loved one can be overwhelming, emotional, and downright frightening. While there’s currently no cure for Alzheimer’s, there are steps you can take immediately after diagnosis to help manage the condition. This includes some suggestions that researchers believe might help slow the disease’s progression.
Here’s a practical list to help families navigate this new chapter with confidence and care.
What’s Next When the Diagnosis Is Alzheimer’s Disease
- Research the disease.
Start by learning about Alzheimer’s disease. It’s a progressive brain disorder that gradually affects memory, thinking, and behavior. Understanding what stage your loved one is in can help you anticipate their needs.
Also, be sure to ask the doctor specific questions such as:
- How advanced is the disease?
- What symptoms should we expect next?
- Are there any new medications that might slow progression?
Reliable sources like the Alzheimer’s Association provide up-to-date, trustworthy information and tools for caregivers and families.
- Build a support team.
After the diagnosis, schedule follow-up appointments with recommended specialists. This might include a neurologist or geriatrician. It’s also helpful to meet with a social worker or case manager who can guide you through care options, resources, and support programs in your area.
Don’t underestimate the importance of emotional support. Reach out to a local or online Alzheimer’s support group for caregivers. Connecting with others going through similar experiences can be both reassuring and helpful.
- Begin legal and financial planning.
It’s crucial to start or review existing legal and financial planning while your loved one is still able to participate in decisions. Important steps include:
- Establishing or updating a power of attorney (for finances and healthcare)
- Creating a living will or advance directive
- Reviewing bank accounts, insurance policies, and estate plans
- Exploring long-term care insurance or Medicaid planning
- Create a care plan.
A care plan outlines how your loved one will be supported now and in the future. Consider who will assist with daily tasks, attend medical appointments, and help manage medications. Think about both current and long-term care needs.
It’s also important to keep the senior engaged in activities they enjoy. Staying mentally and socially active can help maintain quality of life and slow cognitive decline.
- Make the home safe.
Evaluate your loved one’s living environment to ensure it’s safe and dementia-friendly. Simple changes like labeling cabinets, removing tripping hazards, and installing grab bars can make a big difference.
As the disease progresses, you may need to add locks to exterior doors to prevent wandering or use GPS tracking devices for safety. Researchers say that an estimated 60% of people with Alzheimer’s will wander from home at some point. And those who wander once are more likely to do so again.
- Take care of the caregiver.
Caring for someone with Alzheimer’s can be physically and emotionally exhausting. Don’t try to do everything alone. It’s essential for caregivers to take breaks, ask for help, and care for their own mental health. Take time now to explore nearby respite care services, adult day programs, and dementia care communities.
- Try to be flexible and empathetic.
With time, you’ll likely witness many changes in your loved one. Alzheimer’s is a progressive disease that can be difficult for both the person living with it and those who love them. Remember, what works today might not work next year—or even next week. Be prepared to adjust routines, seek new resources, and approach each day with patience, empathy, and understanding.
Specialized Dementia Care at Heritage
With eight specialized dementia care programs across the state of Michigan, Heritage leads the way in caring for adults with different types of memory loss. We invite you to call a location near you to learn more or to schedule a private tour at your convenience.
by Shelley | Jun 27, 2025 | Caregiving, Dear Donna
Dear Donna:
An older lady at my church was recently the victim of a phone scam. According to her daughter, she lost a considerable amount of money. While I consider my parents to be pretty savvy, even with technology, this news left me feeling concerned.
I’ve followed your blog for a year or so now and know you always have helpful suggestions for seniors and their families. Do you have any tips I can share with my parents? I’d like to do everything possible to keep this from happening to them.
Sincerely,
Judy in Muskegon, MI
Safety Suggestions to Help a Senior Avoid Being Scammed
Dear Judy,
Unfortunately, scams targeting seniors are much too common. According to the FBI, fraud complaints involving older victims rose 14% in 2023! Phone scams against seniors are on the rise, with fraudsters using increasingly sophisticated tactics to steal money or personal information. With greater awareness and a few preventative strategies, however, families can significantly reduce the risk. Here are seven essential tips for protecting the senior in your life from phone scams.
- Educate loved ones about common scams.
Start by talking openly about the types of scams that target seniors. Common ones include fake IRS calls, lottery or sweepstakes scams, tech support fraud, and impersonation of grandchildren or loved ones in distress. Scammers often create a sense of urgency, demanding immediate action like wiring money or giving personal details. Remind loved ones that government agencies, banks, and legitimate companies never request sensitive information over the phone.
- Encourage screening of calls.
Teach your loved one to let unknown numbers go to voicemail. Most legitimate callers will leave a message. Encourage them to only return calls to trusted contacts or those they recognize. Caller ID can help, but it’s not foolproof. Scammers can “spoof” numbers to look like they’re calling from a familiar organization. If a message sounds suspicious, it’s best to ignore it and consult a trusted family member.
- Use call blocking technology.
Install a call-blocking service or device that automatically filters out potential scam calls. Many phone providers offer built-in options, and products like CPR Call Blocker or Nomorobo can help reduce robocalls and unwanted numbers. Cell phones also have settings or apps available that can silence unknown or suspicious calls.
- Set up a trusted contact system.
Create a list of trusted contacts with your loved one—family, friends, doctors, or financial advisors—so they know who to turn to if they’re unsure about a call. Let them know it’s always okay to hang up and check with someone they trust before taking action. This extra step can prevent hasty decisions made under pressure.
- Encourage the “hang up rule.”
Stress that it’s okay—and often necessary—to hang up if something feels wrong. Scammers are trained to keep people on the phone. The longer the conversation, the more likely the victim may be manipulated. A good rule of thumb: if someone is pressuring you for money or personal details, just hang up.
- Monitor financial statements.
Encourage your parents to keep an eye on their financial accounts. Reviewing bank and credit card statements regularly can alert them to unauthorized transactions early. If you have any concerns about their ability to do this, ask if you can be added to their accounts or have your own login. Should you notice anything suspicious, help them contact their financial institution immediately to investigate.
- Stay connected and involved.
Isolation increases the risk of scams. Seniors who feel lonely may be more likely to engage with callers. Regular check-ins from family members help reduce this vulnerability. Creating open communication about finances and online safety also fosters trust and reduces the stigma if a mistake is made.
“How Seniors Can Stay Safe Shopping Online” is another article on the Heritage blog that you might find helpful in protecting your parents’ financial health. It has good tips for making online purchasing less risky.
I hope this helps, Judy! Thanks for sending us this question.
Kind regards,
Donna
by Shelley | Jun 27, 2025 | Healthy Aging
Visiting a loved one in assisted living can be an enjoyable experience—for both of you. These visits offer opportunities to connect, share memories, and check in on their well-being. However, it’s common to feel unsure about how to spend the time, especially if this is your first visit. It can also be more complicated if your loved one has health challenges or cognitive decline.
With a little planning and thoughtfulness, you can make every visit enriching and memorable. Here are practical tips for making the most of your time together.
Planning a Visit to a Senior Loved One in Assisted Living
- Plan ahead but be flexible.
Before your visit, try to get an idea of your loved one’s daily routine and plan around it. Most assisted living communities have scheduled meal times and activities. Some even have quiet hours, such as early in the morning or late in the evening. Remember that these communities are home to many, not just your family member.
If your family member has a serious health condition or dementia, try to check with staff beforehand to see if it is a good day to visit. It’s also a good idea to have an age-appropriate talk with your children ahead of time if your family member has Alzheimer’s disease.
You don’t need to plan elaborate entertainment. Often, just being present and spending time together is enough. But bringing something personal can spark conversation and joy. Family photos and videos are usually appreciated and enjoyed, especially by those with memory loss.
Listening to music, looking through photo albums, playing a board game, or even sitting outside in the garden if the weather permits are great options. If you are bringing your children along, consider organizing a craft project you can all complete together.
Finally, know that senior living communities typically welcome family members to participate in scheduled group activities. Your loved one might like the chance to show off their family to fellow residents.
One of the most valuable things you can give during a visit is your full attention. Put away your phone and focus on being fully present. Speak slowly and clearly if your loved one has hearing or cognitive issues, and allow them time to respond without rushing them.
If your loved one has dementia or Alzheimer’s, meet them where they are. Avoid correcting their memory or pushing them to remember things. Instead, focus on positive emotions and shared moments in the present.
- Include the staff in your visit.
Take a few minutes to speak with the caregiving staff when you arrive and when you leave. They can offer insights into how your loved one is doing day-to-day, and you can share any observations or concerns. Building a good relationship with staff ensures your loved one’s needs are being addressed and that you’re informed and involved.
- Leave on a positive note.
Finally, when it’s time to leave, end the visit on a positive and reassuring note. Give a hug and express love and appreciation. It also helps if you let your senior loved one know when you might be back to visit. For those with memory loss, keep a calendar in their room where you can write down the date you will return.
Ask the Team for More Advice
At Heritage Senior Communities, we welcome family visitors every day. We know this time together is important for our residents. If you need ideas for how to make the most of your visits, talk with the team at your loved one’s community. They are always happy to provide suggestions specific to a resident’s unique situation and needs!
