by Shelley | Jun 1, 2024 | Caregiving
Dear Donna:
My mom moved in with my family a few months ago after my dad passed away. Whether it’s swimming outside or attending our kids’ sports events, we are always on the move. Because my mom really isn’t safe staying alone, we’d like to include her in as many activities as possible. We also want to make sure we do so safely.
While my mom doesn’t have any serious health conditions, she does struggle with a few minor medical issues. A big concern for us is that she doesn’t seem to handle the heat as well as she used to. I am particularly worried about keeping her hydrated, as I’ve heard that is an issue for older people.
Do you have any suggestions for me on seniors and hydration?
Sincerely,
Kim in Saginaw, MI
What Caregivers Should Know About Senior Hydration
Dear Kim:
First, my condolences on the loss of your father. I’m sure this has been a difficult time for your entire family. Adding a loved one to the house is likely an adjustment for everyone, too.
You are right to be concerned about hydration for your mom this summer. The hot, humid days can be tough on people of all ages, but especially older adults who can become dehydrated fairly quickly. The summer sun also places seniors at increased risk for additional heat-related illnesses, like sun poisoning and heat stroke. Learning how to spot the signs of dehydration, as well as what you can do to avoid it, is important.
Common Signs a Senior Is Experiencing Dehydration
Recognizing when a senior loved one is in the early stages of dehydration allows you to treat the condition before a more serious health crisis occurs. Here are some of the common symptoms to look out for this summer:
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- Headache
- Dizziness
- Weakness
- Confusion
- Dry mouth
- Irritability
- Sunken eyes
- Trouble walking
- Rapid heartbeat
- Low blood pressure
Thankfully, there are steps you can take to help prevent a senior loved one from experiencing dehydration.
How to Keep a Senior Loved One Hydrated This Summer
- Pump up fluid intake: Preventing dehydration during the hot, humid days of summer requires eating and drinking the right foods and beverages. Water is almost always the best choice. Ask your mom’s doctor for guidance on how much she should be consuming on a typical summer day, especially if she’ll be outdoors in the heat. If she doesn’t care for the taste of water, try adding lemon, lime, cucumber slices, or berries to enhance the flavor. When you are planning menus, incorporate more foods that have high water content. These include melons, pears, berries, cucumbers, leafy greens, tomatoes, carrots, and popsicles.
- Limit caffeinated beverages: Drinks like iced coffee or frozen soda are popular during the summer because they taste so good, but the caffeine content can put a senior at increased risk for dehydration. While a single 8-ounce cup may not have much caffeine, super-sized cups or multiple caffeinated beverages in a day can create a problem. Caffeine is a diuretic, meaning it causes fluids to pass through your system faster. That fluid loss can contribute to dehydration.
- Skip the alcohol: From weddings to graduation parties, summer is a season for celebrations. Many of these include alcoholic beverages. Just like caffeine, alcohol can contribute to dehydration. Seniors who are spending more than a few minutes at a time outdoors in the heat should limit or avoid consuming alcoholic beverages.
- Review medication side effects: Many people aren’t aware that some medications can increase sun sensitivity. That means they can put seniors at risk for dehydration or a serious sunburn. Most pharmacists can help you identify any of your mother’s prescriptions that might be problematic. This list of medications that cause dehydration can also help.
- Dress wisely: Another way to keep your mom cooler and hydrated in the heat is through her wardrobe. Be sure she has a few pairs of quality sunglasses and hats with brims that shield her face and neck. Loose-fitting, lightweight clothing, preferably made of cotton, can also help.
I hope these tips are useful to you and your mom, Kim. One additional suggestion you might find helpful now that your mother is living with you is to explore local respite care options. For example, Heritage Senior Communities welcome short-term guests whose family caregivers need a break or a vacation. We invite you to call one of our communities to schedule a private tour today!
Kind regards,
Donna
by Shelley | Mar 24, 2024 | Caregiving, Dear Donna
Dear Donna:
I’m planning to relocate to a senior living community this summer. While I live in Florida now, my search is taking me to the Holland, Michigan, area to be closer to my daughter and her family. It will make it easier for us to be more involved in one another’s lives.
I’ve been considering this move for a while and feel it’s a good decision. However, I’ve been a resident of Florida for almost 30 years. Nearly all of my friends are here, as are my doctors, my church, and my volunteer work. The idea of starting over is daunting. Do you have some ideas to make rebuilding my social circle easier? It might help me prepare for this next chapter in life.
Sincerely,
Elizabeth
Tips for Making New Friends after Moving to a Senior Living Community
Dear Elizabeth:
First, it sounds like you have much to look forward to, especially being closer to your grandkids! And Holland, Michigan, is such a lovely area of the country to call home. But I understand how intimidating it may seem. Preparing ahead of time, like you are doing, is a great idea. Just in case you aren’t sure how to start your search, these tips might be helpful.
As far as rebuilding your social circle after a move to a senior living community, I do have a few ideas that I hope will be useful.
- Explore communities convenient to family.
Since you mentioned that you are just beginning your search for a senior community, my first suggestion is to carefully consider the location. While proximity to your daughter and her family shouldn’t be the top or only priority, it should be high on your list. That will make it easier for you to visit and help with the grandkids and for them to be involved in activities at your community.
- Research the Holland area online.
Another tip is to spend time online researching the Holland area. You already have the advantage of your daughter living there, but exploring opportunities of interest to you is important. For example, since you mentioned that you are currently involved in volunteer work, you could look around online to see which organizations might be looking for help. It’s also a good way to look up churches, doctors, and more.
- Get on newsletter and email lists.
Ask all of the senior living communities that you are seriously considering to put you on their lists to receive their newsletters and event information. While the distance will obviously prevent you from attending activities and programs, it will give you a chance to learn more about what happens each day. That will give you a head start once you move and are ready to participate in activities. If you do make personal visits to the communities before making a decision, which we always recommend, plan to attend an event or two when you are in town.
- Be patient but also put yourself out there.
My last suggestion is to give yourself time to settle in, but to also take advantage of opportunities as they present themselves. That might include enjoying a cup of coffee in a common area of the community with neighbors or joining a morning stretching class. If you are a little hesitant to attend activities and events on your own, ask the life enrichment team to introduce you to neighbors who might share your interests. You could also invite family members to join you for a program.
I hope these suggestions are helpful to you, Elizabeth. And I’d like to encourage you to keep Heritage Senior Communities in the Holland area on your list. One of our team members will be happy to take you on a tour, answer any questions you might have, and invite you to one of our daily life enrichment activities.
Kind regards,
Donna
by Shelley | Mar 24, 2024 | Caregiving, Healthy Aging
Online shopping has become a convenience many people rely on and take advantage of almost daily. It’s so easy to order whatever you need from the comfort of your sofa and have it all delivered right to your front porch. As more shopping malls and discount stores are shuttered due to decreasing foot traffic, online bargain hunting has become a necessity. That means learning how to shop safely online is important.
For those who are less tech-savvy, it’s easy to fall into traps that can cost you a lot of money. Research shows as many as 50% of Americans who shop online have experienced a cyber hack. The FBI’s Internet Crime Complaint Center estimates people over the age of 65 lost $3.1 billion in 2022 alone.
What can you do to protect yourself while shopping online? We have a few tips that might help you stay safe.
Be On Guard Against Online Shopping Scams
- Use credit cards, never debit cards.
Debit cards might help you avoid overspending, but they can also put your bank account at risk for hacking and fraud. This is especially true when shopping online. If you pay for an order by debit card and the site is a scam, a thief can empty your financial account before you realize something is wrong. While your bank will usually return the funds eventually, your accounts may be frozen until the investigation is complete. In contrast, when you use a credit card to make a purchase from an illegitimate website, the credit card company will usually take quick action to protect your account.
- Stick to stores you know and trust.
Social media is another way criminals target people for fraud. Scammers buy ads featuring attractive clothing, vacations, and household items for too-good-to-be-true prices. People click on the links not realizing they aren’t legitimate companies. Shoppers’ products never arrive, their credit card numbers are stolen, or both. Avoid this problem by making online purchases only from stores you know and trust, such as those you’ve visited in person. Also, be sure you go directly to the store’s website using a Google search. Never click on and follow links you receive via email or on social media, no matter how realistic they look.
- Check site security before ordering.
Another essential safety tip for online ordering is to verify the website is secure. It’s fairly easy to do. Check to make sure the site’s web address begins with “https” and has a tiny icon of a lock next to it. That combination signals a site is secure. If you don’t see that lock or the “s” after “http,” it’s best to avoid shopping on the site. Doing so might put you at risk for identity theft or other types of financial scams.
- Monitor financial accounts.
Finally, make it a habit to check your financial accounts regularly. That might mean not setting up your accounts to pay bills automatically. When you do so, it’s tempting to skip routinely reviewing online statements. That could lead to fraudulent activity being unnoticed for months. Apply this practice to credit cards, investment accounts, and banking. It’s also a good idea to take advantage of alert systems most financial institutions have available. You can set up notifications so you are contacted by phone or text when a major charge is made, an account balance reaches a pre-set limit, or there is a login from a new device.
Bookmark the Heritage Blog
If you found this article to be of interest, we encourage you to bookmark this blog and visit often. Each week, we share a new post on topics ranging from caregiving and healthy aging to dementia and senior care.
by Shelley | Feb 16, 2024 | Caregiving, Dear Donna
Dear Donna:
My mom is almost 80 years old and starting to require more help than our family can manage in her home. My husband, children, and I have been providing support to my mom every day for over two years now. She needs assistance with household tasks, transportation, meal preparation, and laundry. Some days, mom even needs a helping hand to take a shower and do her hair.
My father passed away several years ago, and he was a veteran. I’ve been told there is a special benefit that veterans and surviving spouses can qualify for, but I’m not familiar with it. While my mother and father were always good at managing their money, my mom lives on a fairly tight retirement budget.
We hope to find some financial assistance to help pay for in-home care for her while we search for an assisted living community. What types of care does this benefit cover and would my mom qualify?
Sincerely,
Theresa in Williamsburg, MI
Learn More about the Aid and Attendance Benefit
Dear Theresa:
I’m glad you wrote to me about this benefit that helps qualifying veterans and surviving spouses connect with the senior care they need. It isn’t very well known, so it is frequently overlooked.
Let me start by saying it sounds as if your family is on the right track. People often use home care services as a short-term solution. It provides support that gives families time to look for an assisted living community that best meets their senior loved one’s needs.
In addition to assisted living communities and nursing care centers, home care services may be covered by the VA Aid and Attendance benefit. That’s because having professional caregivers visit the senior’s home to perform tasks such as bathing, grooming, meal preparation, laundry, and light housekeeping improves safety, health, and quality of life.
Requirements for Aid and Attendance Benefit
To qualify on the physical needs side of the benefit, the veteran or surviving spouse must meet at least one of the following physical requirements:
- Need another person to assist with everyday tasks, such as grooming, meal preparation, bathing, and dressing.
- Be bedridden or spend long periods of time in bed due to an illness or disability.
- Be a patient in a nursing home due to a disability that led to the loss of physical or mental abilities.
- Have limited eyesight, such as 5/200 with glasses or contacts or a concentric contraction of visual field to 5 or fewer degrees.
Answering how a veteran or surviving spouse qualifies to receive additional money through the Aid and Attendance benefit is a little tougher. There are income and net worth limits, dates of service requirements, as well as other factors. One of the Heritage team members can likely walk you through this part of the process.
I hope this information is useful to you, Theresa. I invite you to call one of our Heritage Senior Communities locations near your Michigan home. We’ll be happy to schedule an in-person meeting to answer your questions about this benefit and assisted living.
Kind regards,
Donna
by Shelley | Jan 22, 2024 | Caregiving, Dear Donna
Dear Donna:
I’m hoping you have some ideas that might help me care for my 83-year-old mother long distance, at least for a while. She lives alone in northern Michigan in the house my siblings and I grew up in. Until my dad passed away 6 months ago, it seemed like a safe and happy place for her to live. After his passing, I’ve become more concerned.
My mom has macular degeneration that is somewhat controlled with treatment. While she isn’t able to drive, she manages fairly well at home. The retina specialist she sees tells us that could change fairly quickly, however.
I don’t want to try to force her into moving to a senior living community so soon after losing my dad. However, I feel like we need a plan for managing her care now and once her vision worsens. My dad always handled tasks like filling her medication tray and driving her to the doctor for her treatments.
I live on the West Coast with my family but visit my mom every few months. It’s the time in between that concerns me. Do you have any tips for supporting a parent long distance? When will I know it’s time to be more forceful in encouraging her to move?
Sincerely,
Justine
Caring Across the Miles: Tips For Long-Distance Caregivers
Dear Justine:
First, please accept my condolences on the loss of your father. I’m sure that is difficult on many levels, not the least of which is concern for your mother.
We often hear from adult children whose parents have been able to compensate for one another’s challenges and can live safely at home. Once one parent is on their own, however, the need for change becomes more pressing. A few factors I would encourage you to consider and plan for are:
- Finding transportation: For many older adults, especially those in rural communities like northern Michigan, finding reliable transportation to and from appointments and errands is a challenge. If your mom doesn’t have a friend or family member who can help, contact your local agency on aging. Many maintain lists of either volunteers or professional services who assist seniors with transportation.
- Investigating prescription packaging: Since you mentioned your dad always filled your mom’s pill box, I’m sure this is a worry for you now. You could try calling the pharmacies she uses to see if they offer packaging services. They are sometimes referred to as punch cards. Pharmacies pre-fill these in the order/time of day a dose should be taken. That helps prevent older adults from making dangerous mistakes with medication. If that isn’t an option, try a tech service like the MedMinder pill organizer.
- Creating a local support system: Another suggestion is to try to assemble a local support team for your mom. This could include friends or family who are willing to check on her and could get to her quickly in the event of an emergency. If you don’t feel comfortable relying on them, consider hiring a geriatric care manager. These care management professionals can usually help with everything from overseeing people you hire to clean your mom’s house or mow the lawn to beginning the process of downsizing a senior’s home.
- Utilizing video chat: Don’t underestimate how valuable video chatting with your mom every few days can be. It will allow you to see her face-to-face to assess how she is doing and even how her house looks. If she doesn’t already use a device like an iPad, it’s probably worth investing in one and helping her set up Zoom or Skype.
- Trying home delivery services: Investigate which local stores and services are available to support independence. For example, many pharmacies will deliver to older adults at no additional cost. See if her favorite grocery store delivers or works with a service that does. If funds permit, maybe hire a personal chef who comes right to the home. Some will prepare meals for clients and stock their freezer.
- Exploring vision support resources: Lastly, try to connect with an organization that advocates for and assists people with vision loss or a vision impairment. Most communities have nonprofit agencies that fill this role. They will likely be a good resource for assisting with your mom’s unique needs.
Assisted Living for Adults with Vision Loss
One final suggestion is to consider helping your mom transition to an assisted living community while she still has some of her vision. Though most people with macular degeneration don’t experience complete vision loss, it will be more challenging to move to a new environment with severe vision loss. Getting relocated and settled in before that happens is a definite advantage.
Other benefits of assisted living for adults with vision problems include transportation services, housekeeping and laundry, medication management, and healthy meals. We invite you to call one of our Heritage Senior Communities to learn more about how assisted living can help an older adult with vision loss remain more independent!
I hope this is helpful, Justine, and I wish you and your mom the best of luck!
Kind regards,
Donna
by Shelley | Jan 15, 2024 | Caregiving, Dear Donna
Dear Donna:
While my kids were home from college on holiday vacation, we visited my parents for the first time in over a year. I call and video chat with my parents several times a week, and they always tell me they are managing everything just fine. That’s why we were so shocked at what we found when we got to their house.
Both my mom and my dad have lost weight they didn’t need to lose. I checked their refrigerator and cupboards, and it’s obvious they are relying on frozen dinners and canned soups. Both parents are walking with canes they bought at the drugstore. My mom had bumps and bruises on her arms and legs, and my dad admitted that she’s had a few falls lately. That frightens me as I know how dangerous a fall can be for seniors.
The condition of their house was equally surprising. Their bedroom had a large pile of laundry waiting to be done. The floors badly needed to be vacuumed. The bathroom shower obviously hadn’t been cleaned in a while. My parents always kept their house and yard neat and tidy, so this was definitely not typical of them.
After a long discussion, they reluctantly told us keeping up the house has become a real struggle. They are both having a difficult time caring for their personal needs. My mom has been experiencing frequent falls and is afraid to get into the shower. While my dad is doing a little better physically than my mom, he seems to be having a tough time too. We all agreed it’s time for them to make a change. After some preliminary research online, it seems like assisted living might be a good solution.
My parents and I agreed that I would start calling assisted living communities near their house. We want to ask some initial questions to screen out places that don’t seem to be a good fit. I’ll fly back to town in a few weeks to take my parents to visit the assisted living communities that seem like good options. As I’m preparing my list of calls, I’m trying to figure out what to ask. I’m new to this process so I don’t really know how to get started.
Any suggestions?
Sincerely,
Bonnie in Douglas, MI
Questions to Ask an Assisted Living Community
Dear Bonnie:
It sounds like you are on the right track! But the search for an assisted living community can be overwhelming, especially if you aren’t familiar with senior housing options. Call communities in the area of town your parents would like to live in to learn more about them.
I do have a few suggestions for questions you’ll want to ask:
- Availability: Since it sounds as if there is some urgency to transition your parents to a safer environment, it’s a good idea to ask about availability. Some of the best assisted living communities are full and have a waitlist. If there is a waitlist, inquire about how long it is expected to be before something opens up and what the process is to get on the list. You may be required to make a deposit and fill out an application.
- Affordability: If your parents are like most people, they’ll have a budget. Try to get an idea of how much they can afford to pay for assisted living each month before you start calling. Keep in mind, there might be options for financing care. For example, if one of them was a veteran, they might qualify for some financial assistance. Or if they purchased long-term care insurance, the policy may include assisted living coverage. Some assisted living expenses might even be tax-deductible.
- Other questions: Finally, on your initial screening call, think about factors that may impact whether your parents would consider a particular community. For example, if your mom and dad have a pet, will they be welcome? Another one might be transportation. Since it sounds like you live far from your parents, finding an assisted living community that has a transportation team or can make arrangements for getting to and from appointments might be important.
Once you’ve narrowed your list, the next step is to schedule in-person visits and assemble questions to ask. “Important Questions to Ask on an Assisted Living Tour” will be a good resource to review when you are ready to move forward in the process.
Good luck with your search! Please keep the Heritage Senior Communities in your area in mind as you make your calls.
Kind regards,
Donna
